The first date is your chance to make a lasting impression. You want him excited to see you again, but with so much pressure, it’s easy to worry about messing up.
Here’s the deal: a bad first date can ruin your chances. Men quickly decide if they see potential.
If you don’t grab his attention, he might move on before you get a second chance.
As a man, I know what we love on a first date. Follow these 10 tips, and he’ll be eager to plan the next one.
- 1. Choose Beautiful Outfit
- 2. Arrive on Time
- 3. Ask Thoughtful Questions and Be an Active Listener
- 4. Maintain Eye Contact, Smile, and Body Language
- 5. Keep the Conversation Light
- 6. Avoid Controversial Topics
- 7. Be Authentic and Let Your Personality Shine
- 8. Use Humor to Break the Ice
- 9. Limit Your Phone and Other Distractions
- 10. Send a Thoughtful Follow-up Message After the Date
1. Choose Beautiful Outfit
Don’t make a mistake before you even arrive at the date. Choose an outfit that highlights your best features but doesn’t reveal too much.
First impressions matter more than you think, and your outfit is the first thing he’ll notice. The right choice can set the tone for the entire evening, showing him that you’ve put thought into this date.
For example, a classy dress that accentuates your figure without being too revealing strikes the perfect balance. Pair it with stylish yet comfortable shoes—remember, you don’t want to spend the evening worrying about sore feet.
Accessories should complement, not overshadow, your look. A delicate necklace or a pair of earrings can add just the right touch of elegance.
Avoid extremes. You don’t need to wear something too flashy or trendy just to stand out. Instead, focus on outfits that make you feel confident and beautiful.
Confidence is incredibly attractive, and when you feel good in what you’re wearing, it shows. A well-chosen outfit says, “I’m here to impress, but I’m also comfortable being myself.”
2. Arrive on Time
And no, a few minutes might not be a big deal, but don’t push it. If he’s picking you up or waiting at a restaurant, don’t keep him waiting for half an hour.
Respect his time just as you expect him to respect yours. Men notice when you value their time, and nothing says “I’m not interested” like showing up late.
Being late can come across as disrespectful, and men hate actions that feel dismissive or inconsiderate.
Punctuality shows you’re serious about the date and that you respect him enough to be on time. Plus, it sets the right tone for the rest of the evening, showing that you’re reliable and considerate—qualities that every man appreciates.
3. Ask Thoughtful Questions and Be an Active Listener
Skip the generic small talk and dig deeper. Thoughtful questions show you’re genuinely interested in who he is. Instead of asking about his favorite band, try something that opens up a real conversation.
For example, ask about a decision that shaped who he is today or what he’s most passionate about outside of work. These questions invite meaningful discussion and reveal what truly matters to him.
Related: How to Keep Conversation Flowing on Your Dates
But asking good questions is only half of it—you need to be an active listener too. Show your engagement by making eye contact, nodding, and responding thoughtfully.
Reflect on his answers and share your own experiences in return. This creates a connection, making the conversation flow naturally.
Men appreciate when you’re genuinely interested in them. It’s not just about asking questions but about being present and making him feel heard.
4. Maintain Eye Contact, Smile, and Body Language
Your eyes, smile, and body language are incredibly powerful tools—use them wisely. A genuine smile and steady eye contact can instantly make him feel more connected to you.
Eye contact shows confidence and interest, signaling that you’re engaged and paying attention.
Your body language speaks volumes, too. Lean in slightly when he’s talking to show you’re interested and keep an open posture to make him feel at ease.
Avoid crossing your arms or looking around the room; these signals can make you seem closed off or disinterested.
A warm smile, meaningful eye contact, and inviting body language create a vibe that’s hard to resist. They show him that you’re confident, approachable, and genuinely interested in what he has to say.
These subtle cues can make a huge difference in how the date goes and whether he’s eager to see you again.
5. Keep the Conversation Light
First dates are all about getting to know each other without diving into heavy or overly serious topics. Keep the conversation light and fun to create a relaxed atmosphere. Talk about your hobbies, favorite movies, travel experiences, or even lighthearted stories from your past.
Avoid topics that could lead to awkwardness or tension, like politics, religion, or ex-relationships.
The goal is to enjoy each other’s company and find common interests, not to get bogged down in serious discussions. When the conversation flows easily and feels effortless, it leaves both of you wanting more.
Remember, the first date is about building a connection—not solving life’s big questions. Keep it light, and you’ll set the stage for future, deeper conversations.
6. Avoid Controversial Topics
You’ve already heard it: steer clear of politics, ex-relationships, and religion—unless you share the same faith. If you do share the same religion, discussing it can actually bring you closer. But if you’re from different backgrounds, it’s better to save that conversation for later.
Also, avoid bringing up negative topics like local tragedies or rising car accidents. These can easily dampen the mood and create unnecessary tension.
The first few dates should be about having fun. Keep things lighthearted and enjoyable. This is your time to connect and enjoy each other’s company without getting into anything too serious.
Focus on what brings smiles and laughter, not what could lead to awkwardness or discomfort. Keep it fun and easygoing—that’s the key to making him want to see you again.
7. Be Authentic and Let Your Personality Shine
Be proud of who you are, and don’t be afraid to show it. He’s already interested in you since you’re on this date, so let your true personality shine.
Authenticity is incredibly attractive. Don’t try to be someone you’re not just to impress him—embrace the qualities that make you unique.
Show off your best sides, whether it’s your sense of humor, your kindness, or your passion for something you love.
Men appreciate confidence and genuineness. When you’re comfortable in your own skin, it makes you even more appealing. Remember, the right guy will like you for who you are, so let him see the real you.
8. Use Humor to Break the Ice
Chances are, he’ll try to throw in some jokes to break the ice, but that’s not always guaranteed.
Don’t be afraid to jump in with a few jokes or something lighthearted. Not only will you help yourself relax, but you’ll also make him feel more at ease.
When he feels relaxed, he’s more likely to enjoy the date and want to see you again.
Even if you’re not the best at telling jokes, guys find it cute when you try. It’s not about delivering the perfect punchline—it’s about showing that you’re comfortable enough to have fun.
Related: Top Traits Men Look for in Women
A little humor goes a long way in creating a positive vibe, and it shows that you’re not taking things too seriously, which is always refreshing.
9. Limit Your Phone and Other Distractions
There’s nothing worse than constantly looking at your phone or being distracted during a date. I know we’re part of a digital generation, and notifications pop up all the time, but limit that as much as possible.
If you really need to use your phone, be polite and say, “Sorry, I just need a minute for something important.”
Otherwise, keep it tucked away unless it’s to enhance the date—like showing him something interesting, taking a photo together, or doing something that makes the moment better.
It’s always better to be fully present on a shorter date than to spend hours together with constant distractions.
Being engaged and focused shows respect and interest, which can make a huge difference in how he feels about the time you spend together.
10. Send a Thoughtful Follow-up Message After the Date
Unfortunately, guys won’t always send you a message after the date saying how great it was. They will text, but they’re less likely to praise the date outright. That’s where you should step in.
Sending a thoughtful follow-up message shows him that you had fun and appreciated the time together.
This small gesture can make a big impact. It’ll get him thinking more about the date and help him realize just how well it went.
Related: 9 Things Men Really Want During Dating You
A simple message like, “I had a great time tonight; thanks for a lovely evening!” can leave a lasting impression.
Don’t wait for him to make the first move. You’re showing confidence and interest by reaching out, which can make him even more excited to see you again.